Maybe You Don't Need a Psychic Reader (Not Even Me)

My new cleaner saw my room set up for psychic readings, and perhaps looked at my business card which is there too.

'Are you some kind of spiritual reader?' she asked when she was ready to leave. I explained the things I do, and she said she needed some stress relief for both herself and her daughter.

I told her it wasn't a good idea for her or her daughter to see me, as I'm a client of the cleaning service she works for. Professional ethics on both sides would mean we need to keep boundaries between these things. But I said I'd be happy to refer her to someone else, and enquired what exactly she was wanting.

When she described the emotional stress her daughter was going through, I said, 'My chiropractor is also a kinesiologist. She recently helped me clear some emotional issues I was having trouble coping with. Maybe she could help your daughter.'

'Oh yes!' said my cleaner. 'The specialist told me my daughter should see a kinesiologist and an iridologist.'

I told her I happen to know an iridologist too – whom I have never used myself, but a number of people I know have consulted her and speak of her very highly. I ended up giving out the phone numbers of both, and my cleaner went away feeling relieved and hopeful.

Yes, I expect I could have helped with Reiki, a psychic reading, an energy clearing, even magic – all are effective tools – but apart from the fact that the cleaner and I should keep things professional, it's more useful for people to receive what they most specifically need.

As for me, acting with integrity is better for my reputation than pocketing a bit of extra cash.

Channelling — the next level

 OMG! I just did it.

I've always been reluctant to be a voice channel. The most I would accept was to 'hear' stuff in my head and then relay those words to the hearer (usually a client for a psychic reading). I knew it wasn't me thinking the words, because if I stopped 'putting it on loudspeaker' (as a friend used to say) it would stop. I had to keep speaking it for the next bit to come through. 

That was fine with me. People didn't always realise I was channelling, because it just sounded like me speaking – but  that was OK; I could always explain if I thought they needed to know. And anyway, I would usually be saying things like, 'I'm getting...' or 'They want me to tell you...'

I had an unexpected call this morning from one of the Goddess group, who had a friend from the city (C) staying. In fact I met C a couple of days ago at our beautiful Equinox celebration. She decided she would like a reading, and her hostess must have suggested me (which is nice, as it must mean she valued the reading she herself had from me some time ago). I squeezed C in at the end of a busy day spent doing all manner of other things.

It was a great reading with the Tarot cards – I love being able to give people good news! – then I went to my crystal ball and waited, as usual, for whatever might come through. Being more clairsentient than clairvoyant, I don't scry with it. I put one hand on it and hold the client's hand with my other, then get my messages. I started to tell C what I was getting, gave her quite a long message, then was prompted to ask her if she had any questions. The question she asked got the beings who were speaking through me quite excited!

I started by responding, 'They are saying...' then suddenly I was speaking directly. That is, it was not me speaking, although it was my body doing so in physical terms. I even heard my voice change ever so slightly, and I had an awareness of plural energies.

One of the things they told her, they prefaced by saying, 'The channel's beliefs are at variance with this' (while I did an internal double-take at them talking ABOUT me) – and indeed it was so; I found the views they expressed quite confronting. However, the message was for my client, so I didn't try to interrupt. Nor did I experience any doubt about it whilst it was coming through, even though it startled me.

What she said was that the problem with giving unconditional love was that with love comes grief. I  heard them say, animatedly, 'Oh no!'.

I said to her, 'They are saying, "Oh no!" ' – and suddenly it was them talking to her directly, not me relaying it a bit at a time.
They said that with love comes joy. We only think otherwise because we think this world is all there is.

'It feels real and intense,' they said, 'But it is ephemeral.'

It seemed to me at first that they were giving the old Christian message that the earth doesn't matter and Heaven is all. I certainly don't like that view! But they sought to explain further – not always able to find adequate words in the English language – making it clear that they weren't describing the traditional Christian view, nor that of any religion.

'There is much that is not understood,' they said. I had the sense that it is beyond the understanding of anyone who is on this plane.

They also hastened to add that this does not mean we can sit back and do nothing, on the grounds that it doesn't matter anyway. Far from it: we must do our best to foster peace, and unconditional love; we did choose to come here to learn and grow and this place is a vehicle for that. (This was more like what I do subscribe to.) 

It was moving. We were both in tears by the time I finished. 

Explaining afterwards to C that it was a first for me to do it that way, I said, 'The energy felt beautiful'. I was slightly surprised when she beamed and agreed – forgetting, briefly, that she had been experiencing the same energy for the first time too.

I am no longer reluctant to be a direct voice channel.

Clairvoyance and Cold Calling

Sometimes the local Spiritualist Church invites me to be a guest speaker, on any topic I’m guided by Spirit to address. They are Christian, but open-minded enough to understand and respect my focus on Deity as Goddess and to pray, themselves, to ‘Father and Mother’, knowing that God is either or both (as well as beyond all categories). Afterwards I usually do some quick, public psychic readings for individuals in the congregation. I don’t normally attend the church on other occasions, but yesterday Spouse and I went along because Joan, a locally famous clairvoyant, was going to be there giving brief messages for people. A psychic medium myself, I seldom have the opportunity to be on the receiving end.

Due to time constraints, the messages were indeed brief and not for every person present, so I was thrilled when she stopped in front of me and asked, ‘Who’s Florence?’ I told her, ‘That’s my Nana.’ Then she asked, ‘Who was it who learned piano?’ and I said, ‘That’s Mum.’

‘They’re both here,’ she said, ‘Sending you lots of love.’ She asked who loved fishing, and who was a member of a Masonic Lodge (she could see him dressed up in the costume). They were my stepfather and my Dad, respectively. She then said she was getting the name ‘Keith or Kath’. I hesitantly suggested my Aunty Kathleen, but added that she never called herself Kath, in fact hated that abbreviation of her name. It was much later that I realised it was more likely a close family friend called Keith, who boarded with us for years when I was a schoolgirl and died shortly before my Mum did.

The spirits told her that I love reading, that I read lots and lots of books, and mentioned the word ‘library’. I was always a bookworm, and I was a librarian for 18 years.

She mentioned someone called Bill. Spouse and I both knew it had to be my previous husband, who died in 1995. ‘What’s he got to say for himself?’ I asked. She said, ‘He’s saying he likes your new curtains.’ Yes, we have recently got new curtains. I laughed, ‘That’d be Bill.’ I recognised it as his way of making a little joke to confirm that he’s the one who pops in now and again when I feel a presence.  He’s not the only one who does that, but there are times when I get a strong feeling it’s him. Now I know for sure. I could just hear him saying something like that, with a cheeky chuckle.

She didn’t get so much for Spouse, but did ask if he had a daughter. (Yes, he has.) She said, ‘I’m seeing a woman who’s connected to your daughter. I can see her holding the little girl’s hand. Again, both Spouse and I knew this must be his first wife, who died last year. ‘She is sending lots of love to you and your daughter,’ Joan told him.

None of this was particularly dramatic. Mostly it was simply a message that these people who have passed on were sending their love. Yet it was exciting in a way to be told so, and certainly warming. With hindsight I notice that in each case she was given either a name or some very specific information that would identify the person exactly.  For instance, his love of fly-fishing was one of the defining things about my stepfather, the thing that would of course be included if anyone told you about him.

She knew nothing about me or my circumstances, and the messages were delivered very quickly; she wasn’t probing or anything — yet she was correct about the new curtains, the love of reading, and the library connection, all very specific things that you wouldn’t get if you were faking.

Not that I suspected her of faking. Her reputation is excellent. But a few months ago one of my writers’ group said she has trouble believing in psychics because she has read how easy it is to do ‘cold calling’, a technique for faking the ability by being sufficiently vague to start with and watching the client’s body language. She tried it on me in front of the group for a few minutes to demonstrate, and was jubilant when my facial expression confirmed one of her guesses. 

The rest of the group wanted to get on with writing, so I cut short the experiment there. Afterwards, as at least one other person there had had a reading from me, I wished I‘d said, ‘Tell her how I do it‘ — because I use Tarot cards and a crystal ball, and when I use the crystal ball I don’t scry, I touch it and close my eyes. In other words, I’m not watching the client’s body language at all. When I use the cards, they are pre-shuffled and spread in an untidy heap from which clients are invited to let themselves be drawn to the right ones. That is, they themselves select the cards. And, although the cards have room for interpretation, they do have particular meanings which can’t be too far departed from.

The sceptical writer did assure me she wasn’t alleging that I did cold calling; she was just saying it made it hard for her to trust psychics. It hurt a little all the same. It was very, very close to saying she thought I might be doing that (or else that I must be fooling myself). Hard to justify what I do, though, when I’m the one doing it. The proof of the pudding is in the eating, i.e. it’s the clients who can verify my ability — or not. That’s why it was good to notice that Joan could not have been faking. She didn’t fish around, she jumped straight in with details that weren’t a bit vague and couldn’t have been guessed. They were accurate for the people she was talking to, in very specific ways. And, like me, she had her eyes shut a lot of the time whilst tuning in. 

Yes, there are fakes out there. Don’t let that blind you to the fact that some of us are genuine.

Should Practitioners Charge for their Gifts?

Pagan Magic asked:   

This is a question that I see a lot, and I would like to know the opinion of the people here.

Should a spell caster charge for their gifts - is it right to make money from the Craft, or should it be freely given?

I said:

I have a double standard. I charge for doing psychic readings and mediumistic work, and for any form of hands-on healing – except for very close friends and family with whom there is a lot of give-and-take and no-one could possibly keep track of who owes what to whom. For absent healings I don't usually charge; it becomes too complicated. In return I feel free to call upon other absent healers to help with any work I need for myself or others. Again there is that give-and-take operating amongst us. And so far I haven't charged for doing spellwork either, for similar reasons.

I do however like the point that others have raised, that when a spell is requested one has the right to ask for an energy exchange. I might do that if it were a member of the public asking rather than someone close to me. Mostly, however, clients ask in the context of readings or healings I'm doing for them. If possible I instruct them in how to do their own spells for their particular purposes, and incorporate that instruction into the time for which they're paying. If it's complex, though, I just tell them I'll 'do something' later. If they offer me a gift, or extra money, I accept; if not, no matter.

I have a friend who is able to 'see' people's energetic origins before their life in this place and time. She herself is what she calls a 'feathered angel', whose joy and purpose is to serve; so she never charges for the psychic information she is occasionally impelled to give someone. The first time I met her, she walked past my market stall while I was doing a reading, and caught my eye. She came back later to tell me – as others have done – that when I read I am plugged into Source. She added, 'You are a human being. You have chosen to do this work. Never let anyone tell you that you shouldn't charge for it. I never charge for what I do, because I'm an angel and it's my duty to serve. But you have chosen it freely and you have a right to be recompensed.'

I like what I recently heard a healer say (after working on my husband for free): 'I do some work for love and some for money. This one's for love. Aren't I lucky that I can choose to work for love or money?' I guess that's how it is for me too; and if the choice is sometimes arbitrary, well that's my right and privilege.

PS A young woman did once take me to task in the market for charging for spiritual work. She cited the case of 'a wonderful man named Edgar Cayce who never asked for money for the wisdom and healing he gave the world.' I was a bit flabbergasted and just reiterated that I was comfortable with what I was doing. I didn't think until afterwards to ask whether Edgar Cayce had a day job or people who supported him! (Of course I have some books about him, but they focus on his spiritual, not mundane life.) Personally I'm on the Age Pension, which is a frugal living, and the readings etc. merely supplement it within the allowable limits.

Later:

 Re-reading [other answers, some weeks later] I think it rather depends on whether one treats it as the career / profession, or as something extra, outside one's everyday work.

If you're working as a shop assistant, accountant, hairdresser, plumber, you-name-it, then some form of donation or other energy exchange when you do magickal work for others might well be sufficient. It's fine to refrain from charging for the work if you are provided for by some other means.

But some of us choose to make this our actual occupation and source of income, and that's a valid choice too. Then it becomes like any other form of self-employment: a means to eat and pay the bills. It's just that we choose to work at something that is both our passion and our service.  (Not unlike those who have a vocation for nursing, teaching, etc.)

In my case I used it to supplement the Age Pension within the limits legally allowed, as the Pension alone was impossible to live on when I was in private rental. Now that I have recently moved into Housing Department accommodation at lower rent, I've retired from my regular work as a psychic medium and energy healer, but will continue to help some people privately — for love, barter or money, as appropriate. I have been given gifts; I also spent much time, energy and even money developing them, and I'm good at what I do, so I don't have any qualms about being recompensed financially.

Fraudulent Psychics

Pagan Magic said (in  November 09):
It came to my attention yesterday that a local tarot reader - who seems to have only just appeared on the scene - is making very upsetting and disturbing predictions.

One of his clients, a young girl - was told that the predictions were always right, and that her brother would kill his best friend in a car accident, before committing suicide - she (the querent) would commit suicide shortly after this. Obviously this has left her feeling very shaken, and as she has a disabled mother - very emotionally distressed.

Now, as I've heard this third-party I can't very well confront this young man - however I am putting together a press release for my local papers (and one that I can later turn into an article for general distribution).

The press release will cover the following areas:

The rise in people turning to psychics
Types of psychic and their services
Guide to choosing a respected and reliable reader
What to avoid - the signs of a fraudulent psychic
The Law - i.e. the UK Consumer Protection Regulations

I would like to hear from genuine psychics on what people should look for and what to avoid - so that I can provide a responsible yet practical guide to prevent other people from being affected, not just by this young man - but by other fraudulent people.

Thank you for your help.

‘Mel’ said:

Thank you for asking. :) The future is many times changeable. I personally believe that if such a terrible psychic message were to come across to me, it would also come along with advice on how to prevent or alter the future. People aren't told of their tragic deaths unless it isn't their time and there is a way to change the outcome. Personally, even if I saw such an outcome, I most likely wouldn't share it because it would cause way too much fear. However, I might delve deeper to see if there was a message I was being asked to pass along in order to alter the future event. I have inadvertently prevented such things but I was never aware of the danger, I only gave a message and advice, it was taken to heart and that is how the tragedy was avoided. Anyways, here goes:

1. A good psychic will tell you that the future is changeable.
2. A good psychic will never tell you that they are always right. No psychic is 100% accurate.
3. Do not trust a psychic that tells you that there is a curse on yourself and/or your family and that they need additional money to light candles for you in their church in order to lift the curse.
4. Do not trust someone who tells you that they can solve all your problems for you through their own magick and ask for personal belongings from you and/or more money to buy supplies for a ritual.
5. Do not trust someone who puts you down for your deep rooted beliefs. Example: You work with the Angels and mention it to them and they tell you not to do that anymore. This kind of thing is an attempt at dis-empowering you...making you vulnerable and more dependent on them.
6. Don't trust someone who brags about themselves and goes overboard on trying to convince you of how powerful they are.
7. Do not go to a psychic when you are extremely depressed or grieving unless you already have a trusted relationship with one. When we are vulnerable and go out looking for a psychic, this is often when we attract bad psychics. You can get lucky and find a good one but as a rule of thumb, take care of yourself, go talk to a friend, meditate, exercise...do something to bring your energy and mood level up before seeking out psychic advice.
8. You shouldn't feel worse after seeing a psychic. Even if the session made you cry (it happens) you should still leave feeling lighter, like a weight has been lifted off of your shoulders.
9. Don't trust a psychic that needs personal information about you before they start the reading. If a psychic asks you for clarification during the reading, chances are, they are digging for information to use.
10. Consider promises and guarantees red flags.

Not all "bad psychics" are bad people. Some are people pleasers that just want to feel special and want to be liked. They may be beginners at reading and believe that they are better than they really are. It's not right but it's not the same as the others out there that are intentionally out to manipulate and control others. These types are in a different, more dangerous class. Some of them really are psychic but are using their gift in a really negative way.

Good psychics come with different personalities and different ways. Some are quiet, some are loud, some are bubbly and some are solemn. Best thing to do is go by the guidelines above but also trust your gut. Everyone has an intuition about things. If alarms are going off inside you, pay attention.

As a reader personally, I never know if my reading is accurate until after it's over and the person gives me feedback. I don't ask for any information. First name and a handshake is just the polite thing to do. I tend to do all the talking (and prefer it that way) throughout the reading, just letting the information flow out. When someone starts talking during the reading, it totally throws me off and my emotions and opinions get in the way, it lessens the accuracy of the reading. It is my belief that the message is already there, it's not something the psychic has to think about, they just have to receive and deliver it. But again...I don't mean to pass judgment on other good psychics, this has been my experience.

I said:
     
Yes, Mel's remarks are excellent, and cover the matter thoroughly.  I would only differ on one point. In my own practice I do ask for feedback on what I am getting, in the specific instance when I am working as a medium. I describe who I am "getting" and ask if they know that person; or, if they have asked to be put in touch with someone in particular who has passed over, I will ask if I am getting the right person. It's not uncommon for some other deceased friend or relative to come through, and we both need to know who is communicating.

I have an arrangement with my guides that if there is something the client is not supposed to know, then I don't get it in the first place. It saves all the worry about whether I should or shouldn't tell them. If I do see anything untoward, I don't leave it at that; I find out either how to prevent it or, if that is not possible, how to deal with it for the best.

I tell my clients that "nothing is set in concrete" and that "forewarned is forearmed"; that I can only tell them what the tendencies are at this point, and they have the power to change them. If they have a dilemma, I try to show them what each option would be like for them so they can make an informed choice.

Oh, and another thing - the mark of a professional is that they'll refund your money if you're unsatisfied. I have only had to do so once, when a woman came back after her reading, to complain that she had wanted serious advice and I had fed her a string of platitudes. I felt this was far from the case, and she simply didn't want to let in what I had told her - however I just said, cheerfully, "Oh, let me refund your money then," and handed it to her. She was mollified, and allowed that I had probably done my best. I later heard that she was bad-mouthing me all over town for being a fake, but I wasn't worried - plenty of people knew otherwise.

In fact I had given this woman extra time at no charge because I wanted to help her understand the changes she needed to make in her life. That's probably another sign: a good psychic will be more concerned to be of service than to be rigid about times - unless there are other clients waiting.

Once More, the Psychic Work

Today I gave my first psychic reading in the new home. It felt good to get out my cards and crystal ball again, and clear my energy in preparation. The space that will be my consulting room is still half-full of unemptied boxes, so I set up at the dining table. Dear Spouse greeted the client (a member of our writers’ group) then disappeared into his office to work on his novel.

My first live, face-to-face reading, that is. I almost forgot that a client I’ll call Earring Lady phoned me from Arizona the other day. She’s an Australian with lots of family here, who frequently spends time here visiting them, but spends even more time in the United States because she’s married to an American.  She and other members of the Aussie extended family have had a number of readings from me over the years.

I was caught on the hop. I’d just been unpacking some of those boxes of books in the garage, and dashed inside to answer the phone. I was sweaty and flustered. However I tuned in, because she thought she must have lost her camera. My description of the place I ‘saw’ sounded to her exactly like a place where she had been with her camera that day. This was one time I thought I’d like to be proved wrong, because my impression was that she won’t get it back.

She phoned because, she told me, ‘When my brother-in-law lost his car keys, you helped him find them.’ This was exciting news. I vaguely remembered the reading.  I hadn’t been at all confident of answering that question correctly, because it’s not the sort of question I’m usually asked. People usually want advice on major life issues.

As did my client today. It’s nice that in her case I didn’t see any hiccups, but many good things happening for her in the year ahead. I’d much rather be the bearer of good tidings! If bad things do show up, I then investigate how they might be avoided, or if that doesn’t seem possible, how to deal with them in the best way. ‘Nothing,’ I tell my clients, ‘Is set in concrete’. (Unoriginal, I know, but it makes the point.)

In the case of Earring Lady, she went on to ask me about a couple of other items she’d recently mislaid, things of mainly sentimental value which she’d been a bit careless with.  I was then prompted to suggest she think about what else in her life she might be in danger of losing by not paying enough attention to it. Three things in a row — that seemed like a message from the Universe.

After today’s client had left, I had an email from a friend asking what I ‘got’ about some things happening in her life. As I’d just been working, it wasn’t hard to do a quick reading for her too.

My own message from the Universe appears to be that retiring from the Sunday markets doesn’t mean the end of my psychic work. Good! I enjoy it.